Friday, September 28, 2007

Someone Is Stealing Money Out Of My Paycheck, And I Think It's The Government

Have you ever bothered to calculate how much money the government actually takes out of your paycheck per year in taxes? Well I did, and I think you should too, because it will totally change the way you think about how this country should work. I was looking at my pay stub today, and noticed that I get a dickload of money taken out in taxes every week. Approximately $440 dollars is the amount of that weekly dickload. That's a pretty big dickload, isn't it? I mean, I always look at my pay stub to see if there's anything unusual on it, but I never actually bothered to compare the amount of taxes I pay to how much I'm left with afterwards. I was bored, so I thought to myself, "I wonder what percentage of my total pay Uncle Sam takes from me per year?" I did some calculations, and I figured out that the government takes 34.288% of my paycheck per year. Holy shit! HOLY SHIT! That's a lot of money...MY fuckin' money! I didn't give them permission to take that much money from me! No one from the government ever came to me and said, "Ok, Chris, we're gonna take about 35% of your paycheck, and you can keep 65%...is that cool with you?" Where the hell does my 35% go? I'll tell you where it goes. It goes to old and broken social programs, like welfare. The fact that we still have a welfare program is just fuckin' insane...and socialist! Really...the welfare program is socialism at its best. They take your money without asking you and give it to poor people who are too lazy/stupid/drugged out/etc. to go get a job or stay in school. All the bleeding heart weenies out there try to fool themselves by saying that it's not the welfare recipients' fault that they live in a ghetto or a trailer park and they have no money or job. Oh really? It's not their fault? Well who's fault is it? Mine? My parents'? My dog's? I don't know these fuckin' people on welfare, and it's not my fault that they turned to drugs or gangs and dropped out of school and just became waste products. Why should I, or any other hard working American have to bear the burden of stupid peoples' mistakes by having part of our tax money go to the welfare program? We shouldn't have to...it's ridiculous! If you're stupid enough to think that it's a good idea to drop out of school and join a gang, or to start making heroin use a daily festivity with your friends, then it's your own fuckin' fault that you're poor and have no job. Go fuck yourself!

People's response to cutting off welfare is usually, "Oh how could you do that to them...that's so mean...we'd have tons of homeless people running around if you cut off welfare." Well...we don't have to have tons of homeless people running around if we cut off welfare...because I have a solution. First, we kick out all of the illegal immigrants. Second, we convert all welfare offices and employees to the JET Force (Job Enforcement Task Force). Since the JET Force is just all the welfare system employees under a different name, they'll have the records of where all welfare recipients live. So, we send JET Force officers (oh by the way, creating the JET Force also creates new jobs, because we'll need officers to actually do the enforcing) to the welfare recipients' houses, and we grab them by the ears and drag them out of their houses and give them the jobs that all the illegal immigrants we kicked out used to have. It makes more sense to have a legal US citizen mowing my lawn than an illegal one. Since all these welfare recipients will have jobs, we won't have to pay them my money and your money in the form of a welfare check anymore. We can cut off welfare, and keep that money for ourselves to spend and invest. But of course, that will never happen because everyone in America has turned into a bleeding heart pussy. "It's too mean," everyone will say. "You'll hurt the illegal immigrants feelings if you kick them out," they'll say. "The welfare recipients have been out of the workforce for too long, and they won't be able to do a good job at work," they'll say. You know what I say? Fuck off, grow a pair, stop bein' a fag, and start making people take responsibility for their own actions and their own lives.

Wow...sorry for that rant about welfare...I don't know how I got into that when I only wanted to rant about high taxes. Soooooo yeah...taxes. I was gonna talk about that. Well they're too high. They should only exist to pay for public works projects (roads, water mains, bridges, etc.), military and government officials' salaries, and fighting global Islamic terrorism. Making me pay for things like welfare is just unacceptable (sorry...couldn't help but mention that again). We should also migrate to a flat income tax of 10% for everyone...none of this tax bracket nonsense. If the government cut spending on unnecessary programs (like welfare) and made a 10% flat tax, then all of us would actually get to keep more of the money we work hard for so that we can invest it in things. If all Americans had more money to invest and spend on things, the economy would become stronger because there would be more money circulating around the country at a more steady and healthy pace. But as usual, this makes way too much sense, so the government will never do it. They'll just keep taking our money and spending it on stupid things. And if Hillary Clinton should ever become president (God forbid), you can kiss even more of your money good-bye. That 34.288% will skyrocket to 50% or more. That's how she'll pay for her "universal health care" nonsense. My grandparents went up to Canada on a trip last week (they have universal health care up there), and were shocked when they got a glass of cheap wine and it cost $18. They noticed on their bill that the sales tax was 14%. When they asked the waiter why it was so high, he said it's because that's how their government pays for the universal health care plan...they raised the sales tax to 14%. I saw a Canadian commercial on YouTube one time that was making fun of how high their taxes are, and it said their income was being taxed to the tune of somewhere around 60% when they included all the government programs that needed to be paid for. That's just evil. So Hillary wants us all to pay for each other's health care like in Canada? Yeah, fuck that. I also read today that she wants to give every newborn baby in America a $5,000 savings bond, so that the family can save it and let it earn interest to help pay for college, yet she has no plans for actually enforcing that it be used for college. This plan would cost $20 billion in its first year alone. You know who pays that $20 billion? Yep, you guessed it. Me and you...Joe Taxpayer. If you vote for her, I hope you're an extremely generous person, because every 30 seconds, when a baby is born in America, your bank account will be taking a hit to pay for those $5,000 savings bonds. I love how she just wants to take our money and hand it out to everyone. Gee, I wonder if she's a socialist? Whatever...I'm not trying to blatantly persuade anyone to vote one way or the other...I'm just trying to prepare you ahead of time for how much money you aren't going to have if Hillary Clinton becomes president. I'll say it one more time so it sinks in...take my word for it...if Hillary Clinton becomes president, taxes will be so high that you will have considerably less money to freely spend than you do now. If you're gonna vote for a democrat...fine...but for the sake of our taxes...don't vote for her.

58 comments:

Jasper John R. said...

Well, ChrisBell, sad to tell, it's even worse that you think. You can't tell Bell what you are paying in taxes. There are thee additional factors to consider:

ONE, Inflation! The good old Federal Reserve Bank, which is neither Federal, Reserves anything, or a Bank, prints far more dollars -- both with a printing press and electronically. This technically is monetary inflation, which allows the Federal Gooferment to "tax" everyone who has a dollar. If one pays attention in Ekkeynomics Class, when the sovereign debases the currency by printing more they get to spend these new dollars without taxing the people. Inflation ripples through the economy hurting all sorts of people. After all the stolen wealth has to come FROM somewhere. The net effect is a tax of some number per cent, no one knows exactly, estimated between 2% (Fed's number, 12% some economists' number, and 20% some conspiracy nuts number. So, each year, one can say you've paid an inflation tax. Someone has to pay for all the welfare warfare programs.

TWO, Businesses don't pay tax; you do! Business only exist to make a profit. All of their costs are added into the cost of whatever they sell. Buy a widget and all of their costs are in that widget. Think they paid taxes? Nope, you did. Corporate income tax? Nope, it is deliberately misnamed. It's a Personal Tax Paid By You Via A Business!

THREE, Hidden taxes! Did you know there are federal, state, and local taxes on gasoline? How much gas goes into the products and services you buy? (see item #2) How much gas do you use earning money and getting the stuff you need home to consume? Yup, you paid more taxes.

FOUR, Price rises raise taxes and fees! When the cost of goods and services go up, from inflation or greedy gooferment charges more, that is more taken out of the productive side of the economy and flushed down the rat hole of gooferment. So, inflation raises the "value" of your house, then your property taxes go up. So, you sell an "investment" that increased in "value", you pay more in capital gains tax. So, the gooferment publik skoolz pay more for goods and services, they need to raise your taxes to pay it.

FIVE, Gooferment spending crowds out profitable growth! When the gooferment takes more for itself, it silently crowds out better uses of that money. (Basat's Fallacy of the Broken Window) Some of those uses would be important. If I had an extra 100k, I'd probably do something frivolous like buy a car (which would employ lots of people in Detroit). But I don't have it, so those people are not gainfully employed. They are probably on unemployment. But, imagine all the productive wealth building uses that are crowded out. Someone could have opened a new business, discovered a medical breakthrough, or who knows what! That effect is compounded. That is, when Mary didn't find the cure for cancer, then Joe wasn't around to discover the superconductor, that Peter could have used to make a faster computer, that Paul woul have used to halve the cost of your next book from Amazon.

SIX, What is a tax and what is a fee!?! The gooferment mislabels it's revenue collection. If you can't avoid paying it, then it is a tax! Not a user fee. Not anything other than a nasty tax. SO, when you register your car, that's a tax! You can't avoid it. Real Estate Transfer Fee. That's a tax. Regulatory recovery fee on your cell phone. Tax. Rural Telephone Fund Surcharge. Tax! SO make sure when you try to identify all the taxes you pay, you don't miss any.

Bottom line: We have no idea how much we pay in taxes! The number, that we come up with by adding the direct taxes we pay, is only a small portion of what we actually pay. The gooferment is the only think that can force you to pay for services that you don't want, need, or can't afford. And, those services are shoddy, over-priced, and often sometimes even undelivered.

And, the American revolution was fought over the Stamp Act which was a 1% tax on deeds.

Now how do you feel? I feel screwed. When you consider inflation, my tax rate is over 100% of annual year's earnings. Hard to imagine? That's just losing ground on every dollar I save for retirement!

Don't get me started on property taxes for gooferment eddycation and the social insecurity Ponzi scheme!

Chris Bell said...

hahaha...nice comment dude. i see you can rant just as much as me. i'm aware of everything you mentioned about taxes...no matter what way you look at it you are being totally screwed out of all your money...i just felt like ranting about high taxes are in general, and chose to pick on welfare out of all the silly taxes there are (because it's the one that pisses me off the most). don't get me started on property taxes, either...haha.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't have said it better myself! I actually hate my own country these days. There, I said it. And I feel like shit about it, but this damn government has pushed me to that point. I'm over the illegals, I'm over the lazies that sit home on welfare and watch Oprah all damn day (and continue to pop out 3 and 4 kids a year)...just over it. Bush is the biggest thief in the history of this country. And Hillary could only be worse...

Anonymous said...

So I suppose that we should just tell the 3 year old children of these losers, "too bad, we are too greedy to help you out. Looks like you aren't going anywhere in life either." The system is a good idea for giving children an opportunity that they would not have otherwise. My mom made a mistake. She had me at the age of 17. She went on welfare for about 2 years to get back on her feet and give me a chance. Now I am attending UMASS and in the honors society and she is a paramedic. So is my mom a drugged out loser who is lazy? Let's see, last week she worked a 32 hour shift, a 24 hour shift and two 16 hour shifts. Pretty lazy, huh. So before you rant and rave about how people are lazy, keep in mind that not everyone is born into wealth. It is a lot easier to be born into mommy and daddy's social class at birth, but when you are born into lower class it's a little harder to get on the right foot. Also, the more you make, the less percentage of your paycheck is lost to cash. Why is this? Poor people get less taken out then rich people, but it hurts them more because they make less and get a higher percentage taken out. Before you start ranting and raving again, educate yourself, and I don't mean the type of education you buy, I mean the one that you actually learn.

Anonymous said...

I do agree with Jasper, however. I do think the government overtaxes, creating a large deadweight loss in business, eliminating both consumer and supplier surplus. I just don't agree with the original post blaming lower class people. While way too many people abuse the welfare system, we can't stereotype. Some people just don't have that head start that people born into relative wealth do. I agree that so much is taken out for taxes and the money isn't even spent wisely. I think we should complain less about welfare and more about driving down a 3 mile stretch of highway that has been getting repaired for 2 months and seeing 7 guys standing there talking while one works. It's sad because this isn't an exaggeration. In Massachusetts this goes on all the time. You see 10 miles of highway with one lane blocked off. Keep in mind they will only work on a portion of it and start over the next day. There will be two cop cars one in front of the other "warning you there is construction even though they are right in front of the site." There will also be too many workers. Almost every time i drive by these sites the guys are leaning on shovels chatting. So maybe the government should spend money more wisely and they don't have to raise our taxes so much. That would be like somebody blowing their paycheck on 7 personal trainers to better themselves, then taking it out on somebody else financially.

Sweet Melissa said...

You claim to be intelligent and didn't know how much you pay in taxes? Now that's funny! You really think that welfare is why the government takes 34 percent of your wages? Even funnier! Welfare accounts for, without going to look up stats, probably less than 2 percent of America's budget. The defense budget is where all your taxes are going to Mr. middle-upper class super conservative. I am sure you voted for Bush, so actually you can thank yourself for this.
One of America's morals is to help those less fortune than you. We do this in the form of welfare. You really think these people live well? The average benefits for a single mother of one is $600 a month. I bet that is half a week's salary for you. How about you try living on what these so-called stupid, lazy, drugged out individuals live on, and then fed and take of a baby on top it. Maybe it would help you develop some much needed compassion. You also seem to think that America should kick out immigrants, as this will solve the "welfare" problem. It really amazes me that you were able to obtain a college degree. I think they should be able to take it back so they don't look bad.
Oh, and lastly, using the "For Whom the Bell Tolls" as your moniker. I am sure you are really a big Sylvia Plath fan... no one thinks you are clever for using a name of her book just because your last name is Bell.

lovemaee said...

Whoo! Someone else who finally understands how incredibly pointless our tax system is and how wrong it is to steal money from young folks like us. I am 25 and happen to fall into a tax bracket that makes it "fair" for the federal government to selfishly take thousands and thousands of my hard earned income. Hello idiots! If you steal from people like me, who are just starting out in the world, then we're gonna end up like those people on government assistance (who coincidentally are getting MY money). We need that money to make our way in the world in terms of savings, etc. You'd think those smart government guys could make that connection - oh wait, I don't think there are any smart government guys...??? What I want to know is why we can't choose who and what receives our tax dollars. I'd give mine to the Navy (my bro is in it) and to education, and environmental stuff...not people who don't understand the meaning of birth control and why it's wrong to ask for handouts just because you "Can." (I busted my ass in college and grad school to earn my salary - why are they allowed to sit around smoking and having babies? And don't get me started on healthcare for obese and people who make stupid decisions that we pay for through medicare, etc). And I completely agree with you on the tax bracket bogus-ness (yes, I made up that word). I mean hell, shouldn't we be rewarded for earning more money instead of losing more? Where's our motivation to be money earners if they just take it away and give it to people who don't work? Even now I can feel my blood pressure rising cause it just makes me so sick and angry. I know there is nothing I can do about it, but dammit...anyway....that was my pseudo rant. I could go on about this for pages but that won't really help. haha.

I just wanted to say thanks for your blog post 'cause it reassured me I'm not really crazy when I go off about taxes. :)

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Anonymous said...

This is to address Melissa's leftist rant.
1. Welfare was a creation of FDR and LBJ. Not a moral prececdent set by the American people.
Before its institution charity, which is what welfare is, was overseen by the church, private foundations, giving individuals and family.
Charity by its definition is the act of giving not the act of being forced to do something by having money stolen out of ones pocket to benefit the unfit and or foolish i.e. welfare.
Welfare a cute name for wealth redistribution only encourages and enables the unfit and foolish to spawn more of the same thus eventually killing the host much like parasites.
I am neither a wealthy man nor was I born to privlege. But I have worked hard all my life and expect the other person to do the same and not make their problem my problem unless I am a willing participant.
2.Maybe if you had not attended one of our wonderful dumded down institutions of learning, also a direct result of the propagation of the unfit foolish and and just plain stupid, you might have learned,"For Whom The Bell Tolls" was in fact a wonderful novel written by one of Americas greastest writers Ernest Hemingway recounting his involvement in the Spanish Revolution. Yes Spanish as in Spain. Get a clue.

JC said...

"Taxes should only exist to pay for public works projects (roads, water mains, bridges, etc.), military and government officials' salaries, and fighting global Islamic terrorism."

I honestly can't tell if this article is satire or not, but what you have listed is what taxes already pay for.

Also, no one in Canada pays 60% income tax. The highest marginal tax rate is 48% in some provinces. The top tax bracket usually is around $118,000. So every dollar after that would be taxed at 48% for example.

Also, at $440/week x 50 weeks = $22,000 paid in taxes. And you're saying that represents 35% of your income? At that rate, your pre-tax income is $63,000 give or take. In Ontario, for example, at that income level, you average tax rate would be 22%. At $70,000 it would be about 24%.

Pretty sure that's a lot less tax than 35%, with health-care and welfare included. Shitty deal.

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