Have you ever bothered to calculate how much money the government actually takes out of your paycheck per year in taxes? Well I did, and I think you should too, because it will totally change the way you think about how this country should work. I was looking at my pay stub today, and noticed that I get a dickload of money taken out in taxes every week. Approximately $440 dollars is the amount of that weekly dickload. That's a pretty big dickload, isn't it? I mean, I always look at my pay stub to see if there's anything unusual on it, but I never actually bothered to compare the amount of taxes I pay to how much I'm left with afterwards. I was bored, so I thought to myself, "I wonder what percentage of my total pay Uncle Sam takes from me per year?" I did some calculations, and I figured out that the government takes 34.288% of my paycheck per year. Holy shit! HOLY SHIT! That's a lot of money...MY fuckin' money! I didn't give them permission to take that much money from me! No one from the government ever came to me and said, "Ok, Chris, we're gonna take about 35% of your paycheck, and you can keep 65%...is that cool with you?" Where the hell does my 35% go? I'll tell you where it goes. It goes to old and broken social programs, like welfare. The fact that we still have a welfare program is just fuckin' insane...and socialist! Really...the welfare program is socialism at its best. They take your money without asking you and give it to poor people who are too lazy/stupid/drugged out/etc. to go get a job or stay in school. All the bleeding heart weenies out there try to fool themselves by saying that it's not the welfare recipients' fault that they live in a ghetto or a trailer park and they have no money or job. Oh really? It's not their fault? Well who's fault is it? Mine? My parents'? My dog's? I don't know these fuckin' people on welfare, and it's not my fault that they turned to drugs or gangs and dropped out of school and just became waste products. Why should I, or any other hard working American have to bear the burden of stupid peoples' mistakes by having part of our tax money go to the welfare program? We shouldn't have to...it's ridiculous! If you're stupid enough to think that it's a good idea to drop out of school and join a gang, or to start making heroin use a daily festivity with your friends, then it's your own fuckin' fault that you're poor and have no job. Go fuck yourself!
People's response to cutting off welfare is usually, "Oh how could you do that to them...that's so mean...we'd have tons of homeless people running around if you cut off welfare." Well...we don't have to have tons of homeless people running around if we cut off welfare...because I have a solution. First, we kick out all of the illegal immigrants. Second, we convert all welfare offices and employees to the JET Force (Job Enforcement Task Force). Since the JET Force is just all the welfare system employees under a different name, they'll have the records of where all welfare recipients live. So, we send JET Force officers (oh by the way, creating the JET Force also creates new jobs, because we'll need officers to actually do the enforcing) to the welfare recipients' houses, and we grab them by the ears and drag them out of their houses and give them the jobs that all the illegal immigrants we kicked out used to have. It makes more sense to have a legal US citizen mowing my lawn than an illegal one. Since all these welfare recipients will have jobs, we won't have to pay them my money and your money in the form of a welfare check anymore. We can cut off welfare, and keep that money for ourselves to spend and invest. But of course, that will never happen because everyone in America has turned into a bleeding heart pussy. "It's too mean," everyone will say. "You'll hurt the illegal immigrants feelings if you kick them out," they'll say. "The welfare recipients have been out of the workforce for too long, and they won't be able to do a good job at work," they'll say. You know what I say? Fuck off, grow a pair, stop bein' a fag, and start making people take responsibility for their own actions and their own lives.
Wow...sorry for that rant about welfare...I don't know how I got into that when I only wanted to rant about high taxes. Soooooo yeah...taxes. I was gonna talk about that. Well they're too high. They should only exist to pay for public works projects (roads, water mains, bridges, etc.), military and government officials' salaries, and fighting global Islamic terrorism. Making me pay for things like welfare is just unacceptable (sorry...couldn't help but mention that again). We should also migrate to a flat income tax of 10% for everyone...none of this tax bracket nonsense. If the government cut spending on unnecessary programs (like welfare) and made a 10% flat tax, then all of us would actually get to keep more of the money we work hard for so that we can invest it in things. If all Americans had more money to invest and spend on things, the economy would become stronger because there would be more money circulating around the country at a more steady and healthy pace. But as usual, this makes way too much sense, so the government will never do it. They'll just keep taking our money and spending it on stupid things. And if Hillary Clinton should ever become president (God forbid), you can kiss even more of your money good-bye. That 34.288% will skyrocket to 50% or more. That's how she'll pay for her "universal health care" nonsense. My grandparents went up to Canada on a trip last week (they have universal health care up there), and were shocked when they got a glass of cheap wine and it cost $18. They noticed on their bill that the sales tax was 14%. When they asked the waiter why it was so high, he said it's because that's how their government pays for the universal health care plan...they raised the sales tax to 14%. I saw a Canadian commercial on YouTube one time that was making fun of how high their taxes are, and it said their income was being taxed to the tune of somewhere around 60% when they included all the government programs that needed to be paid for. That's just evil. So Hillary wants us all to pay for each other's health care like in Canada? Yeah, fuck that. I also read today that she wants to give every newborn baby in America a $5,000 savings bond, so that the family can save it and let it earn interest to help pay for college, yet she has no plans for actually enforcing that it be used for college. This plan would cost $20 billion in its first year alone. You know who pays that $20 billion? Yep, you guessed it. Me and you...Joe Taxpayer. If you vote for her, I hope you're an extremely generous person, because every 30 seconds, when a baby is born in America, your bank account will be taking a hit to pay for those $5,000 savings bonds. I love how she just wants to take our money and hand it out to everyone. Gee, I wonder if she's a socialist? Whatever...I'm not trying to blatantly persuade anyone to vote one way or the other...I'm just trying to prepare you ahead of time for how much money you aren't going to have if Hillary Clinton becomes president. I'll say it one more time so it sinks in...take my word for it...if Hillary Clinton becomes president, taxes will be so high that you will have considerably less money to freely spend than you do now. If you're gonna vote for a democrat...fine...but for the sake of our taxes...don't vote for her.
People's response to cutting off welfare is usually, "Oh how could you do that to them...that's so mean...we'd have tons of homeless people running around if you cut off welfare." Well...we don't have to have tons of homeless people running around if we cut off welfare...because I have a solution. First, we kick out all of the illegal immigrants. Second, we convert all welfare offices and employees to the JET Force (Job Enforcement Task Force). Since the JET Force is just all the welfare system employees under a different name, they'll have the records of where all welfare recipients live. So, we send JET Force officers (oh by the way, creating the JET Force also creates new jobs, because we'll need officers to actually do the enforcing) to the welfare recipients' houses, and we grab them by the ears and drag them out of their houses and give them the jobs that all the illegal immigrants we kicked out used to have. It makes more sense to have a legal US citizen mowing my lawn than an illegal one. Since all these welfare recipients will have jobs, we won't have to pay them my money and your money in the form of a welfare check anymore. We can cut off welfare, and keep that money for ourselves to spend and invest. But of course, that will never happen because everyone in America has turned into a bleeding heart pussy. "It's too mean," everyone will say. "You'll hurt the illegal immigrants feelings if you kick them out," they'll say. "The welfare recipients have been out of the workforce for too long, and they won't be able to do a good job at work," they'll say. You know what I say? Fuck off, grow a pair, stop bein' a fag, and start making people take responsibility for their own actions and their own lives.
Wow...sorry for that rant about welfare...I don't know how I got into that when I only wanted to rant about high taxes. Soooooo yeah...taxes. I was gonna talk about that. Well they're too high. They should only exist to pay for public works projects (roads, water mains, bridges, etc.), military and government officials' salaries, and fighting global Islamic terrorism. Making me pay for things like welfare is just unacceptable (sorry...couldn't help but mention that again). We should also migrate to a flat income tax of 10% for everyone...none of this tax bracket nonsense. If the government cut spending on unnecessary programs (like welfare) and made a 10% flat tax, then all of us would actually get to keep more of the money we work hard for so that we can invest it in things. If all Americans had more money to invest and spend on things, the economy would become stronger because there would be more money circulating around the country at a more steady and healthy pace. But as usual, this makes way too much sense, so the government will never do it. They'll just keep taking our money and spending it on stupid things. And if Hillary Clinton should ever become president (God forbid), you can kiss even more of your money good-bye. That 34.288% will skyrocket to 50% or more. That's how she'll pay for her "universal health care" nonsense. My grandparents went up to Canada on a trip last week (they have universal health care up there), and were shocked when they got a glass of cheap wine and it cost $18. They noticed on their bill that the sales tax was 14%. When they asked the waiter why it was so high, he said it's because that's how their government pays for the universal health care plan...they raised the sales tax to 14%. I saw a Canadian commercial on YouTube one time that was making fun of how high their taxes are, and it said their income was being taxed to the tune of somewhere around 60% when they included all the government programs that needed to be paid for. That's just evil. So Hillary wants us all to pay for each other's health care like in Canada? Yeah, fuck that. I also read today that she wants to give every newborn baby in America a $5,000 savings bond, so that the family can save it and let it earn interest to help pay for college, yet she has no plans for actually enforcing that it be used for college. This plan would cost $20 billion in its first year alone. You know who pays that $20 billion? Yep, you guessed it. Me and you...Joe Taxpayer. If you vote for her, I hope you're an extremely generous person, because every 30 seconds, when a baby is born in America, your bank account will be taking a hit to pay for those $5,000 savings bonds. I love how she just wants to take our money and hand it out to everyone. Gee, I wonder if she's a socialist? Whatever...I'm not trying to blatantly persuade anyone to vote one way or the other...I'm just trying to prepare you ahead of time for how much money you aren't going to have if Hillary Clinton becomes president. I'll say it one more time so it sinks in...take my word for it...if Hillary Clinton becomes president, taxes will be so high that you will have considerably less money to freely spend than you do now. If you're gonna vote for a democrat...fine...but for the sake of our taxes...don't vote for her.
