Guitar Hero = Guitar Queer-o

Guitar Hero seems to be the tits lately, especially since it got the honor of being made fun of on South Park this week. Everyone raved over Guitar Hero II so much that it seems like developers waited...oh...about...2 weeks after GHII came out to release GHIII. What's the difference between the two games? A wireless guitar and new songs!!! Joy!!! I seriously don't fuckin get the point of this game. I've tried playing it...and I absolutely suck. Do you know why I suck? Because I can play REAL GUITAR!!! My fingers naturally want to move where I know the notes should be coming from...not to the blue button and then the red button and then the green button for a super power up. There are no super power ups in real guitar. You know what you get when you shred a nasty solo with a real guitar? You get chicks...and money (if you play in an awesome band). Chicks and money. What do you get when you push a few buttons in the right order to a background track that someone else actually recorded? Points. POINTS!!! What fucking real life purpose do points serve?!?!?! Next time you're playing this game, try something for me. Turn off the volume on the TV....know what you'll hear? Nothing but the clicking of plastic buttons. You can beat the game with the volume off, because all you need to do is watch the pattern on screen and hit the right button at the right time!!! You're not actually playing a song!!! You're pushing buttons to a moving pattern of colored circles!!! Turn off the amp on your buddy who's playing real guitar...know what you'll hear? You'll still hear him playing guitar cuz he's actually playing a real fucking guitar!!! When you beat Through the Fire and the Flames on expert difficulty in GHIII, all you've proven is that you can push buttons really fast. You haven't proven that you can actually play Through the Fire and the Flames, which is fucking impossible to play on real guitar unless you are actually one of the guitar players from Dragonforce. You don't even need the plastic guitar to play this game...you could play it with the regular 360 or PS3 controller...because, as I said before...you're just pushing fucking buttons!!! How lazy have we become as a society that people would rather play video game guitar than learn real guitar?!?! "Congratulations! You beat Guitar Hero! You. Are. FAGS!!!" (Quote: South Park)

Ok, I'm done ranting. Time to go play some Heroin Hero.